


Soldier keep on marching on

by emilyprentissunsub



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Behavioral Analysis Unit (Criminal Minds), Emily Prentiss Needs a Hug, F/F, How Do I Tag, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, Lesbian Emily Prentiss, Reader-Insert, Sad with a Happy Ending, married emily prentiss
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 16:14:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29985480
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emilyprentissunsub/pseuds/emilyprentissunsub
Summary: "We had to proclaim her dead?""So she's not dead? My wife isn't dead?""No." "She's alive. Barley."/////This is my take at 'Emily Prentiss has someone who cares about her and loves her, someone whose heart is shattered when Emily is proclaimed dead' or 'I had to mourn the loss of seven'.Was originally supposed to be an one-shot but I got too invested.
Relationships: Emily Prentiss/Reader, Emily Prentiss/You
Kudos: 14





	Soldier keep on marching on

JJ's POV//

"She never made it off the table."

Lies. White, painful lies. Emily. God, Emily.

"I didn't get to say goodbye." whispers Spencer. How is JJ supposed to explain to this young boy with the broken soul that Emily's life was in danger. They had no choice.  
She wraps her arms around him, holding him close. Her mind never drifting off, she is a liar. Lying to them all. But it's for Emily. They have to keep Emily safe, surely they will understand that. Surely they will understand that she had to burry her best friend as well. That Emily had to grieve the loss of six, seven, people most important to her.

Seven. Shit. Y/N.

The universe is playing a cruel joke on her, JJ thinks. How is she supposed to tell Y/N that Emily died. Sweet, beautiful Y/N.  
Emily had introduced her wife to the rest of the team a little while ago at Hayley's funeral. Emily came to the ceremony heavily clutching Y/N hand, being afraid she might lose her somehow. That was the first time she wore her wedding ring around the group. Holding Y/N's hand during the funereal. They didn't know, none of them, that Emily had someone. They didn't have the slightest clue. Such profilers. Emily didn't exchange a single word with anyone at the burial, she was absolutely petrified, she told JJ later. If something like this managed to happen to Hotch, what in the world is stopping such a fate to run up to Emily and destroy her only chance at happiness. Holding her wife's hand she stood absolutely emotionless as the team came to introduce themselves and Y/N grabbed the lead by acquainting herself with the people who have become Emily's family. 

"I can't protect her JJ. She is all I have. And I know the universe will try to drag her down because of it."

Emily's words whirled in her brain as she held on tightly to Spencer. How is she supposed to tell Y/N that her whole world had been destroyed. How is she supposed to tell her the ugliest lie that will ruin the young woman's life.

//  
Y/N's pov

"Hey, it's Y/N! I'm currently busy but I will get back to you as soon as possible. Leave the message after the beep."

You crack your knuckles as you press play on your voice mails. The surgery had been an absolute horror show, the patient flatlining just as you were about to close. 7 hours in the operating room and you lost him at the very end. The universe truly hates you today.

Walking down the hospital hall with a phone clutched to your ear, listening to your mom go on and on about how your brother's wife was being unfair forcing him to move away from home and a granola bar in your hand, carelessly munching away, you notice a whisk of familiar blonde hair.

JJ.

Turning off your phone and throwing your half eaten lunch in the nearby trash can you follow shadows and glimpses of blonde hair until you arrive to a secluded waiting area. It's them.

Subconsciously a smile makes it's way up your lips in hopes of seeing your wife after the horrible freak show you just experienced in OR1. 

"Hey guys!" You cheerfully announce yourself and all five heads whip in your direction. Five heads with absolute sorrow on their faces. Five. 

Where is Emily.

"What's happening?" Your eyes are suddenly wide open, trying to find traces of Emily in the waiting room. She's not in the chairs, not pacing around in the corners. She must be in the bathroom. What other explanation there is. You barley saw her in the past weeks. Your crazy work schedule had been overbearing and Emily had insane amounts of work and traveling, catching murderers in the past weeks, you barley saw her at all. But she had to be there, in the bathroom. She wouldn't do anything stupid. Not since you had to drive up to the hospital, almost getting in a car accident on your way there after receiving a call from her team telling you that she stupidly jumped in front of the bullet. And that she was perfectly okay, but with tears already streaming down your face you didn't hear that. She wouldn't do that to you again. Not since you yelled at her that night, for the first time. Your voice trembling, terrified at the thought of losing her. She wouldn't.

"Y/N" Someone gently wraps their hand around your bicep and Aaron's face slowly comes into your view. His eyes are full of regret. Not sadness, but regret and anger. Taking one more look around the room you can clearly see Penelope curled up into a ball, waterfalls down her face smudging her mascara and powder, leaving grey lines on her face.

"Emily. Where's Emily? I want to see Emily." Not caring about their explanations you stand your ground. If something had happened to your wife you deserve to know it right away not after accidentally bumping into them in the waiting area. Of your work place. You work here and they weren't even bothered to call you. 

The grip on your arm tightens and you feel yourself being pulled into a private room. "Aaron! Where is my wife?" Your voice a broken shout now as JJ gently wraps an arm around your waist helping Hotch lead you away from the group of profilers. 

They didn't call you. They decided you weren't worth knowing.

"Y/N, I need you to listen very carefully and never repeat what I tell you. This cannot ever leave the walls of this room. Understood?" Both of Hotch's hands are now wrapped around your biceps holding you directly in front of him, staring right into your eyes.

A million thoughts flow your mind. Emily wouldn't do anything stupid right? She'd tell you if she were in danger right? She would mention if someone was after her, right? Right? She wouldn't leave you in the dark having to fight the monsters by yourself. Right? She wouldn't. She promised you a long time ago in the beginning of your relationship that she would do her best not to leave you in the dark, wondering what you did wrong. She told you the first time you met her, trying to get you and your patient you were operating on out of the hospital with a clicking bomb about to go off, to trust her. And you did, you trusted her then with your whole life and the life of your patient laying on the operating table with his heart open. You blindly trusted her to save you, and she did. And now? 

You weakly nod your head, petrified at your core. You can feel the pain and the terror aching in your bones, making your whole head spin from the utter pain and the unknown.

"Emily has lost a lot of blood and we needed to have her proclaimed dead." 

"She- she's dead?" You don't recognize your voice as it leaves your mouth. So small, so quiet and so scared, almost like a child's. Your legs that kept you standing tall your whole life, carrying you around feeling proud and never ashamed of yourself, shake underneath you and you can feel your knees are about to buckle. Your head was already spinning, the pain now adding white spots and nausea into your demeanor.

"No." Whipping your head so fast towards JJ, you can almost hear your neck snap at the force of your head turning. JJ looks so small, so vulnerable and your eyes finally fill with thick, hot, heavy tears matching the blonde's. "She's alive. Barley."

A sob escapes your lips and your knees finally give up underneath you, Aaron's hands strong around you hold you upright, helping you sit in a nearby chair. Your brain cannot fully comprehend what is happening and you can feel your nausea creeping stronger and stronger.

"So she's not dead?" At this point, tears that have finally left your eyes are leaving marks on your blue scrubs and your fingers start subconsciously picking at your nails, a horrible habit you picked up from your wife. God damnit Emily, what have you gotten yourself into?

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! This is my first ever writing piece so any mistakes are on me!  
> I love Emily Prentiss so much I had to write something, and angst apparently is what my brain automatically writes.  
> Hope you enjoyed! This is multichapter so more chapters are to follow:)


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